the road has been too long

i feel like i've lost some part of myself along the way i've travelled. some say that i achieved more patience, so in that sense, i've grown. but, i feel like i've lost my aggression, the ability to push myself without the slightest pause or hesitation. for example, even if i know what i want to do, what i have to do to get there, i'll contemplate those options for a while before making any move. not that this is truly bad, yet this 'quality' manifesting in inappropriate situations sucks, for lack of a better word. yeah, i can push myself, but always at the last minute. which is better than not pushing at all, but still bad. because it's not truly the best interpretation that can be!!

i need to be more aggressive. yup. mug!